I am feeling suicidal, I need to know how to get over a girl I fancied who is now married with children.?
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I have suffered from depression for a long time, and take seroxat to cope. I have always had low self esteem. I come from a family where everyone is successful, every one apart from me that is. I also have never really had a proper relationship with a woman. Sure I have had many one night stands, but I rarely really fancy a woman (in that I would like to have a relationship with her) and on the rare occasions that I have I never had the courage to ask them on a date.
Now I am massively upset. The problem is a woman called Claire. She was a work colleague of a friend of mine. I fancied her the moment I first met her in the pub arms where her and my friend were having a drink after work. She is beautiful, clever, happy, demure but very done to earth and modest.
Over the years I met her a few times, once I chatted with her in a bar for a while and I liked her even more, but at the time she had a boyfriend. Once I went to her birthday and that was embarrassing I felt she knew I fancied her and all her mates were there.
Then one night in another bar she tried to chat to me before she left but I didn’t say much. Now I wish I’d then had the courage to ask her out. Another time was in a wine bar again she chatted to me, but again I did not have the courage to ask her out.
Each time I did not have the confidence probably due to I was only a student at the time or my job at the time was very low paid, and I felt I had no prospects.
Then she started going out with a guy, first she moved in with him. Then one night came the bombshell, he had asked her to marry him. My friend told me that she told him not to waste money on a ring, this made me love her even more. My job prospects had now improved and I now even owned my own flat.
Finally she left the UK to live with him in Hong Kong. Then my friend dropped the second bombshell that she is now pregnant.
I had always hoped I may one day marry her and now I realise that that is never going to happen. I fantasize, every minute it seems, that we are married, and how lovely it would be, only to brought back to reality and the sense of euphoria to become one of immense depression.
I spend hours wishing I could go back in time and play my hand differently, and asked her out when I had the chance; to the point it drives me crazy. I feel I had the chance and I blew it.
I now feel I will always lead a lonely life as I have no interest in other women as I compare them to Claire and they always fall way short. I feel extremely low even suicidal at times, I feel like a zombie that is just existing not living.
Tagged with: bombshell • confidence • courage • depression • earth • hong kong • job prospects • long time • low self esteem • mates • money • one night stands • proper relationship • rare occasions • wine bar • work colleague
Filed under: how to get a girl
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I know how you feel babes its very hard isnt it to get over someone…
Sometimes life hands us a crap deal and we have to make the best out of what it gives us…
maybe it wasnt meant to be… maybe this is gods way of showin you next time such a good thing comes accross you will be careful and cease the moment…x
I hope this works out the way you want it to be xxx
Message me if you would like to talk xxx
You can remove the worst of this with EFT a free method you can do yourself in privacy…
then use it on the rest of your life, it works..
if you just do it…
cheer up mate, sounds like ur doing okay, u own ur own flat u’ve got a good job, life is good, it is sweet; u’ll meet someone else who will lov u for who ur are; as for this other girl, don’t live ur life for her, live ur life for urself, hav some self-respect and when u wake up tomorrow and the sun is out, the sky is clear and the air is fresh, hav a good look at the world and feel happy to be alive; good luck things will get better!
1. Try Byron Katie – this might really really help you through this. Look at her videos – I think there is one dialogue that is specific to this issue.
2. If you get panic attacks, sign up for the free emails on the panicaway website.
3. Try reading Patrick Holford’s "Low GL diet" – blood sugar imbalances can cause havoc with your body and symptoms include depression, mood swings, tiredness, drowsiness after eating, cravings for sweet foods, headaches, heart palpitations, anxiety, irritability, agrressive outbursts, crying spells, excessive sweating, dizziness and trembling.
4. Keep two journals. One for writing down all your feelings, this is really good for clearing out your anxieties and getting all your
war onto paper, you can delete it straight after if you need to, it’s just good to really see your stressful thinking. And the other can be your gratitude journal – write down all the things you are grateful for that happened today.
5. Read "Happiness is a Choice" by Barry Neils Kauffman. Here is a link about a person who was suicidal and came out of her depression. http://www.option.org/custom:single,595
Sending you so many hugs and so much love.
xxxxxxxx
for every problem there is a jesus answer i got the answer to your depression his name is jesus call him he will make it better call him now we can not do things our own way and expect to be happy we have to do it gods way and trust me he will work it out. your midnight is over your morning joy is here when you get a chance read genesis 2chapter and psalm139